To truly change

Some say change is a linyard line from one place to another.

Others say it is a line – but – with loops on the way – sort of like recycling off path and then back on track.

Or it could be a constant forth and back hoping the forward movement are the once adding up on the plus side.

To me…

Some say change is a linyard line from one place to another.

Others say it is a line –  but – with loops on the way – sort of like recycling off path and then back on track.

Or it could be a constant forth and back hoping the forward movement are the once adding up on the plus side.

To me it has come to be about presence and awareness. Removing layer by layer.

It used to feel like ok now I got it and then I almost got disappointed when it turned out to be yet another layer to work through. Now I have learned to enjoy that – if it can be this much better what could yet another layer not be?

It has also become about moving emotional goal posts – reference points – as well as boundaries. I am not sure, but I must have been a bit of a doormat. I proud myself in being kind, but somewhere between naive and worried not to be liked I became the super diplomat, never really saying really no to anything.

So I practice that now. How much did I exercise my confidence this day and how many nos did I say to anything? Maybe this is what can happen when something goes wrong for one reason or the other and then you take on the guilt role and do that way longer than everybody else? You lose track of where you start and finish and all that other stuff begins?

Tonight I grateful – I am right here – a long road ahead and another longer road behind, but right here is fine – it is my own road and that is all that counts.

325 signals  to go.

Image courtesy to Pixtawan at www.freedigitalphotos.net

 

 

Kind conversations

Why do we expect that because we written something to someone – that they should be ready to respond instantly – and exactly the way we want to? Why is it so hard to let things be and allow some mystery?

I have for periods in my life really focused on changing my language, but it never seems to be really perfect or it can always improve…

Lately I have pondered on the lack of kindness  and gentleness in both the language towards ourselves as well as in the formal communication.

Why do we expect that because we written something to someone – that they should be ready to respond instantly – and exactly the way we want to? Why is it so hard to let things be and allow some mystery?

Do I really have to know the logical answer to why for every single thing?

Universal laws are as logic as it gets right – so why this immense need of sense that we even make it up with our little home made stories to why this or why that?

Is it our ability to create or creative thinking that back fires?  It just kicks off itself regardless what it is about? Or we need to understand what is around us and when we have a story we feel safe? Safer?

I have always had an attraction to the Socrates way of thinking – that all answers are within – and it is all about the conversations we have – or don’t have…

Now I am asking myself how to be more kind and how to use questions as a bridge to heal those gaps of misunderstandings, confusion and possible hurt.

What questions do you use when dealing with opposite opinions or conflicts?

And how do you untangle contradictive conversations with yourself?

Define.Define.Define. Is my new mantra to myself.

332 signals to go. Gently coming home.